A Conversation Could Change a Life
The University of Iowa has partnered with R U OK?, a program designed to help people recognize when someone may be struggling and feel confident starting a supportive conversation.
R U OK? can help you spot signs of concern, start a conversation about how someone is doing, and connect them to appropriate support while following up.
Support Your Team with R U OK?
Units interested in implementing R U OK? with their teams should contact the Employee Assistance Program for consultation at eaphelp@uiowa.edu or 319-335-2085.
Starting a Conversation
Many people going through a difficult time feel relieved when someone checks in. Even if they aren’t ready to talk, it shows you care and are there when they are. Starting that conversation can be challenging. ALEC (Ask, Listen, Encourage action, and Check in) can help guide you.
Ask R U OK?
Choose a comfortable time and place to ask, “How’s it going?” or “I’ve noticed you haven’t seemed like yourself lately—is everything okay?” If they’re not ready to talk, avoid pressing and suggest checking in another time.
Listen
It’s natural to want to solve the problem, but listening to understand is often most helpful. Try not to rush the conversation, and know it's okay to sit in silence. They may work through things as they talk.
Encourage Action
Support them in thinking through next steps. Ask questions like, “Have you talked to a friend or family member?” or “Would it help to look into resources together? I’m here to help.”
Check In
Check in again in a few days, or sooner if you’re concerned they may be in crisis. Remind them you’re there to listen. If you discussed professional support, continue to encourage it, understanding it can take time for someone to feel ready.
Signs Someone Might Need Support
Changes in physical appearance: Look more tired than usual; recent pattern of illness or being constantly run down; are complaining of physical health issues such as headaches or migraines.
Changes in mood: Seem more irritable, snappy, or fly off the handle when they normally wouldn’t.
Changes in behavior: Are not performing to their usual standard; seem more withdrawn than usual.
Changes in how thoughts are expressed: Struggle to be positive; take situations personally; assuming the worst about people.
Additional Support
UI Employee Assistance Program: free counseling and referrals for employees and their families: eaphelp@uiowa.edu or 319-335-2085 (phone)
UI Support and Crisis Line: around-the-clock mental health crisis and support for all students, faculty, staff, and postdocs: 844-461-5420 (phone or text)
988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline: free and confidential emotional support to people in suicidal crisis or emotional distress: 988 (phone or text)
About This Initiative
Through the Well-Being and Mental Health Campus Collaborative, the university's Employee Assistance Program, and campus experts, training and materials have been developed for employees, including supervisors, staff, and faculty. Training for students is forthcoming.
R U OK?™ at the University of Iowa is sponsored by the University of Iowa Employee Assistance Program (UI EAP). All R U OK? materials are owned and developed by R U OK? Australia™ and have been adapted for use at the University of Iowa with permission. R U OK?™ is a registered trademark of R U OK? Australia Limited.